What makes me laugh is that there are these constant posts about “Increasing your reach” “Get the most views” and about a million other posts online about gaining your full potential.
Today I’m going to tell you how not to blog, or write or tweet or contuct yourself poorly on social media in any way.
1) DON’T FUCKING SWEAR. Nothing screams unprofessional more than you dropping cunt in the middle of a sentence. I mean it, you will loose views cause you say “shit” “fuck” “ass” or any other pissing swear word you can think of.
2) DON’T PUT MEMES IN YOUR POST.
I mean, what even are memes anyway? They serve no purpose and they distract from the current economic climate we currently have. You wouldn’t catch me putting a fucking meme in any of my posts what so ever.
3) NEVER MENTION SEX. No one wants to hear about double penetration or the messages you get online. You would never catch me doing the thing here , here or even here.
4) DON’T MENTION SURGERY. No one ever wants to here the gory details about having your chest cut open or anything that involves bodily functions. Just forget that you are even a human being, and if you ain’t able bodied, you shouldn’t fucking post.
5) DON’T BE ANGRY. DO.NOT.BE.ANGRY. You will never see a post on here where I flipped my shit at anything what so ever. I have never built a reputation of being an ANGRY PERSON that it’s even in my tag line. DO NOT BE ANGRY.
6) BE POLITE TO ALL YOUR READERS
7) DONT MENTION THAT YOU ARE PART OF THE LGBT COMMUNITY…. EVER. IT’S BORING AND NO ONE LIKE A BORING GAY BOY.
8) DON’T POST RANDOM PICTURES YOU LIKE FOR THE SAKE OF IT.
It’s not a blog for you, it’s for who you write. You no longer own this shit. No matter how cute you kinda look in that picture.
9) DON’T PUBLICLY ANNOUNCE THAT YOU LOST YOUR HAIR . No one needs to know why after seeing you with your trademark pink hair, it’s all gone.
10) NEVER START A BLOG BECAUSE YOU NEEDED AN ALTERNATIVE TO THERAPY, GET ANGRY ONE DAY AND SUDDENLY REALISE THAT PEOPLE WERE ACTUALLY READING YOUR SHIT.
11) NEVER ANNOUNCE YOU ARE TRANS.
12) OR FROM A JEWISH BACKGROUND
13) NEVER DO A POST THATS AN ENTIRE LIST OF THINGS YOU SHOULDNT DO.
Basically. Do what ever you fucking well want. Write what you want to write, do what you want to do, fuck who you want to fuck (LEGALLY) and most importantly have fun.