After what has felt like an eternity, I finally got back on fetlife again. Before I continue, I know my blog link is on there, and if that’s how you have stumbled upon me, hiii!
I have noticed that things haven’t exactly changed in the kink scene. I thought that maybe with trans issues and things progressing, there would be, but alas its still the same.
I started chatting to a couple of people on kik, one I’ve stopped messaging all together. Not because he misgendered me, not because he was a dickhead. It was because he tried to catfish me. Honestly if you are going to steal someone’s dick picture, you might want to choose a person who has the same body type as yourself. I was upset about the piss poor attempt to be honest and the idea that I would need to see a monster of a dick to impress me. Nah, I want to see real dick, not some stretched out thing stuck on to a body that isn’t even yours.
I’ve had the usual, a few guys begging me to Dom them, and when I say no they get pissy. It’s not like it says on my profile that I will dominate someone. I don’t know why it’s a suprise that I said no. Talking of no I had to block someone because she refused to accept that I didn’t want anything from her. She would message all the time pretty scary messages about forcing me to have sex with her and if I didn’t role play I was just a tease. She got really stalkerish and was a reason why I stopped going on there for quite a while. Eventually I had to block her.
Trying to find a genuine trans inclusive munch or event is like pissing in the wind. The easiest solution we have come up with is that we start running a trans and kinky meet up, which is for trans people and partners. The downside of this of course is that when you are trans and kinky, you bump into several of your friends or people you know outside of kink. Friends discussing sex and play might pose an issue and embarrassment is bound to happen at some point.
I rejected the idea of going to a night a couple of my friends were going because the person attending made a gross and piss poor joke about trans and non binary people using the toilet facilities at the event. Nothing strips a person from their confidence when the event owner makes a joke about a serious issue that would pose a problem for non binary people to use the toilet. I know its their last couple of times the night is running, but surely you want people to attend.
I have also become a walking google. Apparently because I’m trans, I have to answer every goddamn question a non trans person needs answering.
Basically everything is still what it was. I am struggling to find safe places in a community I love, and that saddens me.
Tyler Charles Austen 