Trans Is Not Just For The Young

Most of the time when you see people mention about being trans (especially in the media) they are often in their teens, white, able bodied and often have a planned out set idea of what transition means to them and a goal plan set into motion. Surprisingly, in the real world and especially not online, this is not the case. Whilst white, I can certainly put to bed the suggestion as I started transition after my teenage years and I’m certainly not able bodied.

People are coming out in their later years more and more and this is bucking the trend of assumption that everyone has to be young to be trans. But why is this the case?

There are many reasons why people are coming out later and later but the truth of the matter is that we are having more of an open dialog of gender and sexuality and it is feeling like it is safer to be LGBT then it did many years ago. There is more access to medical care these days and we have so many resources at our finger tips.

It is becoming common for trans people to start transition in their 30s 40s and 50s now and this is because people have finally learned that they are not the only ones who are feeling the way that they do. That its OK to be who you are and you are not alone. Gender and sexuality has become a hot topic and it has saved lives.

If you you have started your transition later, please feel free to comment as to why you started when you did, we would love to hear from you

Hysterectomy History

Today I got my letter to say I’m getting my hysto and I’m really fucking hyped about this. 

🎼say goodbye to babies

Seriously though I have been waiting for this letter for a solid couple of months now and I finally have a finishing point (?) to my transition. It’s been long over due but nearly at 31 years old I am nearly finished with all this bullshit. 

Plus I’m moving on from shots to gel soon so that is going to make my life a million times easier now. So I’m quite excited about that. 

I will post more news when I have a confirmed date, but womb has been given it’s final eviction notice, it is now time to leave 

Sexuality – On reflection

Just after my 30th birthday I made the decision to come out as gay. It had been something that had been waying in on my mind for sometime and eventually I felt it was at that time to do it. 

I suppose looking back on it, it shouldn’t have been as hard as I thought at the time it would be. I had always been attracted to male aligned folks and had always struggled being in relationships with women and woman aligned people. I had battled in my head whether this was just me being misogynistic and that I had a hatred towards femininity, but I realised that no, I just wasn’t physically attracted to women as much as I thought it was. 

I think a huge part of it was that I had some huge internalised bullshit (often brought on by discussions with TERFS) that I was just a self hating lesbian, and that I was forcing myself to be in relationships with men to make myself feel better about it. The truth was, I was forcing myself to identify as bisexual because I thought it might be easier in life and that maybe it might stop the gender feels™.

I spent so long feeling this, that it had become almost a toxic poison consuming my mental health and coming out was in fact a huge fucking relief. 

Then something happened. I started feeling things for one woman in my life. She’s fully aware of this and I have said that I wouldn’t be able to be in a relationship with her because of how it would make us both feel, how it would fuck me up and how I come with so much bullshit it would not only harm her but also myself to persue something that could go so horribly wrong to a friendship I treasure more than anything. I am a gay agender person and she is not a man or even masculine aligned and has had so much bullshit from the gay community that it would emotionally be awful. 

What the fuck even are feelings and emotions? You get yourself fucking organized in life and then POW something or someone comes along and slaps you right in the goddamn face. If these 30 years have taught me anything it’s that life truly isn’t as predictable as you would hope it would be. I thought I had all this worked out by now, but nahh. 

I suppose the thing is that I do have to give myself a break from time to time and actually focus on what will not only make me happy but other people too that I care about.